Full-Time Training - Testimonies

I Finally Found the One Thing Worth Giving my Life To, D.K.

Beginning from when I was really young, I have had a tendency to seek the highest and the best, even though I might not be able to attain to it. My friends used to call me a “perfectionist”. I tried to do everything with a standard of being perfect, although the outcome was not always so. I remember within me I always considered what is worthy for me to spend my whole life on, for me to really endeavor toward: being a doctor? a businesswoman with a lot of male subordinates? or a perfect housewife, devoting everything to my husband and the family?...The more I thought about it, the more I found myself full of conflict within. Each of those occupations sounded great, but none of them seemed to be right for me. I couldn't make a decision. I remember feeling so helpless at times. But I decided I wouldn't waste time addressing this helpless feeling; rather my life just went on and I tried to grasp whatever I could. One day without my understanding it, He who has now become my dearest Lord, came into my life.

I met the Lord through a Christian sister who was a teacher in high school. Through her sharing I realized that human beings, including me, are vessels to contain God and thus express Him (2 Corinthians 4:7). Therefore without God coming into me, I was empty and void of meaning, and God was not happy because He wanted to fill me, He wanted to satisfy me, He wanted everything good for me while I was there looking for satisfaction outside of Him. So I opened and received the Lord.

During my first few times meeting with all Christian brothers and sisters of my age I was so attracted by Christ. I was given a book at my baptism, a biography of Watchman Nee, A Seer of the Divine Revelation in the Present Age. From this book I realized, as never before, that God has an eternal great plan on the earth, which is all about us, human beings, and how we can work with God and participate in what He is doing on earth. “Wow!” This was my reaction within. Although I wasn't very clear about how God is carrying out His purpose, deep within me I wanted this and wanted to give myself for this purpose.

At this point in my life I was beginning to realize that everything that I did, however good it might be, passes away, and passes away very quickly. I just couldn't keep it--no matter how great a time I had, how successful an event might be, how happy and high and exciting it was to be with someone I loved--all would pass away. I found it so deceiving; all that I devoted time to do, I spent much effort to accomplish, did not last. I realize now that those things have no eternal value. Just like Solomon in Ecclesiastes wrote, “God has put eternity in our heart” (Ecclesiastes 3:11), which nothing under the sun but God can satisfy. I began to really yearn for something eternal. After meeting with the church in Hong Kong for a while, I began to hear about the Full-Time Training in Anaheim. I knew that people there were spending all of their time to know God's plan, to know Christ, and to study the Bible. Later I learned that they also learned how to contact the Lord in prayer, and how to have a healthy, sweet and rich Christian life. Moreover, they learned how to share all that they enjoyed of the Lord with others. They learned how to cooperate with God for His purpose on earth. I believe it was at the end of my high school years that I told the Lord, “Lord, I am going to the Full-Time Training.” How good it would be to invest my time, my whole two years in something having eternal value! I gave this matter to the Lord and He finally got me there to the Full-Time Training in Anaheim!

Here I am inheriting what God has been opening and revealing from His Word to His people throughout the centuries. In the training I am getting a chance to have a closer look at the Bible. It is an opened gold mine to me. It is so rich, especially in the sense that it testifies concerning this wonderful Person, Christ, and unveils God's eternal purpose (Ephesians 3:11). Now I love this “opened mine”, and I am drawn to spend more time digging into it. I have begun to see and taste that what is in the Bible is REAL (Jeremiah 15:16); it is not just a record to be read objectively. What is in the Bible is becoming my reality and experience. This and this alone is eternal, supreme, valuable, and worth giving my life to. I often think that I might not know how to express my deep gratefulness to the Lord for bringing me here when I meet Him at His second coming. What else can I do now except give myself and all that I have to Him?

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